Die Hard With A Vengeance (1995) quotes

Director
John McTiernan.

Cast
Bruce Willis.
Jeremy Irons.
Samuel L. Jackson.

John McClane and a Harlem store owner are targeted by German terrorist Simon Gruber in New York City, where he plans to rob the Federal Reserve Building.

Why you keep calling me Jésus? I look Puerto Rican to you?
– Zeus
Guy back there called you Jésus.
– John McClane
He didn’t say Jésus. He said, “Hey, Zeus!” My name is Zeus.
– Zeus
Zeus?
– John McClane
Yeah, Zeus! As in, father of Apollo? Mt. Olympus? Don’t fuck with me or I’ll shove a lightning bolt up your ass? Zeus! You got a problem with that?
– Zeus
No, I don’t have a problem with that.
– John McClane

Yippie-kai-yay motherfucker.
– John McClane

You know how to pick this lock?
– John McClane
Is this some black-shit again?
– Zeus
Hey will you stop that racial shit? Are you a fuckin’ locksmith or not?
– John McClane

Here take this.
– John McClane
How’s it work?
– Zeus
You don’t know how to shoot a gun?
– John McClane
Look, all brothers don’t know how to shoot guns, you racist motherfucker.
– Zeus
Sue me.
– John McClane

I’ll put my foot up your ass, you dumb, mother…
– John McClane
Say it! Say it!
– Zeus
What?
– John McClane
You were gonna call me a nigger, weren’t you?
– Zeus
No I wasn’t!
– John McClane
Yes you were! What were you gonna call me?
– Zeus
Asshole! How’s that, asshole!
– John McClane

What the fuck are you doin’?
– Zeus
Interrogatin’ him.
– John McClane
Well, what’s he gonna tell you, “I’m dead”?
– Zeus
Well, I ain’t gonna know ’til I ask him, am I?
– John McClane

Said Simple Simon to the pieman going to the fair, “Give me your pies… or I’ll cave your head in.”
– Simon

Didn’t I hear you say you didn’t even like your brother?
– Zeus Carver
There’s a difference, you know, between not liking one’s brother and not caring when some dumb Irish flatfoot drops him out of a window.
– Simon Gruber

That guy was pissed.
– Zeus
He’ll feel better when he looks in the back seat.
– John McClane
Shit! That was *my* gold bar!
– Zeus

You’re a truck driver?
– John McClane
No I’m a beautician. Of course I’m a truck driver!
– Jerry Parks

We’ll be back to pick you up in fifteen minutes.
– Inspector Cobb
Take your time. I expect to be dead in four.
– John McClane

You know, you’re the first woman since Holly to see me do this.
– John McClane
I’m honored.
– Connie Kowalski
Yeah, so was she.
– John McClane

Oh, boy… am I glad you talked me out of jumping.
– Zeus

I’m a soldier, not a monster. Even though I sometimes work for monsters.
– Simon

Who do you think you are? Hillary Clinton?
– John McClane

Why me? What does he got to do with me?
– John McClane
I have no idea, he just said it had to be you.
– Inspector Cobb
It’s nice to be needed.
– John McClane

Bonwit Teller. Who the hell would wanna blow up a department store?
– Joe Lambert
Did ya ever seen a woman miss a shoe sale?
– Connie Kowalski

I had no idea Canada could be this much fun.
– John McClane